That was last year, Mother's Day 2016 and it was obviously not my last Mother's Day without our son.
I would be lying to you if you if I said I wasn't fighting back some tears writing this today, but I felt God put it on my heart to write a letter to all the mamas in waiting. Whether you're adopting and haven't brought your child home yet, expecting, wanting to have children but haven't/can't yet, or you just have a desire to be a mama but it's not the right time.
Dear Mama-In-Waiting,
I know today is a bittersweet day. There is so much sweetness in celebrating our mothers whether it be our biological (or adoptive) moms, spiritual moms, or our friends who are rocking this motherhood thing! I also know there is some bitterness too. That desire deep down in your soul, longing to be a mother, to hold your child, to give them sweet kisses, to tuck them into bed at night. A longing to comfort them when they are sad or hurt, to watch them grow, and teach them so many things about this world, and life, and Jesus. I too have that longing, and sometimes it can be unbearable. But, I am here to encourage you.
God sees you, he sees your desires, he sees your heart, and he has NOT forgotten you. I can't answer why he has called you to wait but I can tell you that he is a faithful God, and he is faithful in the waiting. That doesn't mean that the waiting is easy, but it does mean that we do not have to wait alone.
God is near to the brokenhearted and he hears you crying out to him. Continue to lean on Him, let Him fill you with hope and peace. Cast your worry, fear, and anxiety on Him and let him hold you in His arms and draw you in nearer to Him.
These may be words that you do not want to hear right now, or that you are tired of hearing. I get that, I understand that, I have felt that exact same way. But, don't lose hope for when we are at our weakest then His power is complete.
This day may bring many emotions, feelings of anger, joy, bitterness, hurt. That's okay, allow yourself to feel those feelings, and bring that pain to the Father, so that he can bring you comfort and peace. Surround yourself with friends, family, community who will cry with you, love on you, and encourage you. There may be points where you want to brush it off and say things like, "Well, I am not really a mom anyway so it doesn't matter." You are a mother, and do not let anyone tell you differently. God is already growing the love in your heart for you child(ren), he is equipping you with the wisdom and skills that you need to parent them, and he has given you a heart of a mother.
Be encouraged mamas-in-waiting, this is a long and hard road, but you're not walking it alone. Grab the hand of a fellow mama-in-waiting walking next to you, plant yourself firmly in the Father's promises, and keep walking together through this valley, your mountain top is coming soon! You are NOT forgotten!
To my mom, my mom-in-love, and all of my other friends and family, happiest of Mother's Days to you all! I am so thankful that I get to watch you guys love on your children and truly rock motherhood, I know it is not an easy road. I pray that you all feel the love and appreciation today!
